A True Story . . .

I took a month off from the air waves, back in 1995, to take a vacation. I went to Kauai, Hawaii, and spent three weeks on that gorgeous island. I hiked part of the Kalalau Trail, to Honnakapiai. It's about 2 hours of strenuous twists and turns above the breathtaking coastline of Kauai's northwest coast. When I finally arrived, I was startled to see several men dressed in basic golfing attire--button down polos, walking shorts, and headsets. Yes, headsets. Not for golfing, I mean, but there they were on this remote hell-to-get-there beach wearing high-tech headgear and flicking their eyes suspiciously to the right and left. I at first assumed it was a pocololo weed bust. (There were a lot of those recently.) Then I caught sight of the bright orange Coast Guard cutter drifting fifty yards off shore of the first break. It was pretty surreal.

I soon found out that Al and Tipper Gore, yes, the Godfather of the (mis)Information Stupor Highway and Ms. PMRC, were on their anniversary vacation, complete with Goon Squad, and were enjoying a side trip to the fabu Honnakapiai Falls. (Apparently, the Vice President and Second Lady were shuffled from boat to shore aboard a surf board!) This beach is not boat accessible, unless your boat is a sea kayak.

Sure enough, Al and Tipper and an Elite Core of Goons soon emerged from the bush, looking, well, see for yourself below. It was a tough hike. Al's hamstring survived. Tipper's make-up did not. They were pretty friendly. I didn't say much, as they were on their anniversary and stuff. But they let me take a couple of photos of them, and some Deadhead friends I met on the beach, and later, when I hiked back with the Secret Service, they turned out to be OK guys too, helping me out over the rougher parts of the trail. Go figure.